1) A rolling pin is the correct method.     2) Yes, the coconut bag must be sanitized before adding the coconut.  Put it in a pot of boiling water for 5 minutes.  Let it cool, remove with sanitized tongs and put on sanitized plate.  Put in toasted coconut, tie with sanitized string, gently place into fermenter.   3) No.   4) 4 weeks, put ONE bottle in the frig for 3 days, then taste it.  If it's good, put more in.  If it needs more time, give them more time.
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